My Letter to the Augustine Panel

In the previous post.

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I’ve been very tired and felt completely unable to have any effect on my life or on any other things for the last five days or so. This doesn’t mean that I’ve felt lazy – rather that what ever reasonable I have ever done, it has had zero effect on the world.

There won’t be propellant depots. There won’t be thorium reactors. There will always be these huge problems in my personal relationship(s). Or interaction.

NASA will waste its money on some half built heavy lifter, if it ever gets so far. Launch costs won’t go down in my lifetime, and there won’t be any real RLV:s.

Coal burning will just accelerate and the globe will warm a lot by 2100. I won’t be here to see it. And even more after that.

It’s of course, as a single person, unreasonable to expect to change much in such things.

But what has most demotivated me always:

My hands are, have been and will be completely tied in interaction with certain human beings. I can not change the will or situation of some other person. I can’t really even effect it, if the other person doesn’t want to.

The loss of power seems incredible and overbearing at times.

The only thing that one can do with people is leave them and move on. That’s a very limited way of interaction. But that’s what it’s always been and seems to always be.